Don't Kiss The Cook Apron

We've all been there. A delightful summer BBQ, you're grilling up the hamburger patties, when you suddenly feel the soft touch of a pair of lips on your cheek. You turn to the culprit, mildly annoyed. "Why?" You ask them. "Why would you do such a thing?" They point to your grass and dew-stained apron. There they are. 3 words. "Kiss the Cook", your apron says. You are enraged, tossing the apron aside and promptly going on Zazzle to buy an apron to avoid future catastrophes like this. At least, we're assuming that's the reason why you're buying this.